martyr

... what can I say?
what can
what can
can I-- WHAT
--so let nothing be said
let the words ebb
let the words fall
let them break into gibberish
into irrelevance
into nothingness and sentimentality
no more than a hum
no than the echo
of your pulse, so far under your skin
YES! bind them tight in the forms
and the tropes
and whip them when they struggle
oh shouldn't it be sweet incense?
--see me, Lord! my greatest humility
I praise you lips to the ground
I fill my mouth with dirt,
I swallow it! Lord, Lord!
No ghost, no mourner--I!
but I will choke and walk
dumbly smiling,
I will press hands flesh to flesh
--and aren't all men brothers!
surely, my greatest gift
this silent burial
this unmarked grave
find nothing, in the curve of my smile
to offend the eye! the bone
sheathed in this softness
easily torn! Hallelujah!
and let any reaching
for starlight or cloud-wisps
be brought to book
for the vileness
of hands un-held